Two-Column Proof that Girls are Evil

(Internet lint; author unknown)
posted here 5/19/2001; rev. 10/3/2009

Statement

Reason

1. Girls = Time Money

1. Girls require lots of time, and for each unit of time you spend with them, you need money for gas, food, etc. Therefore we multiply, using suitable units.

2. Time = Money

2. Axiom of modern life.

3. Girls = Money2

3. Substitution (2, 1).

4. Money =

4. Money is the root of all evil.

5. Girls =

5. Substitution (4, 3).

6. Girls = Evil

6. Def. of square root; substitution.

(Q.E.D.)